You got to find Santa and then poke him. -Why? Ask Santas glorious belly. It basically begs for it!

Contract an insurance then ensure a big payday by making a scratches combo that it atleast x10. (Yes, insurances work with combos but only in video games.)

Make use of the safety rope while not fearing any consequences which could occur. (All possbile outcomes of the usage have been clearly hightlighted in the fine print of your safety rope manual. We can not be made responsible for any missing manuals that could have been lost in the transport of your safety rope nor will we replace any missing manuals.)

As the old worldly wisdom says: successful men burn all their bridges but only after they passed them first! - Destroy 200 bridges.

Someone said those roads could even be more dangerous if those banners and needle trees would be knocked over and lay on those roads. Nobody says here that someone should do that. Someone else said your right hand would get cut off as punishment when you get caught. On the other hand someone distributes gold in your hands for each knocked over. - Destroy 200 banners/needle trees.

Hats are head enhancement gear, hats are free, hats can be found in presents, hats are randomly generated, hats can be shared, hats look nice on your head but hats can not be bought. Find one of those hats in the Endless Mode.

Collect those hats and equip each of the 7 characters with a hat! Those hats need to be something else then the default ones. The hats have to be of randomly generated types. They can not be special extra hats.

Get yourself a giant meat burger and eat it all up. But first check your belly radius or just pray that you don't explode!

Yes, this cake, including the cherry on top, is not a lie! Let your horse eat it and make sure it does not explode while doing so. To clarfiy: the horse is what you have to keep from exploding while the cake needs to get absorbed by the stomach.

Eat more then humanly possible or horse-ly possible. In the Rogue Rider Mode you have to eat more then the maximum of 10 fat without exploding. You got to use magic to make this possible!

This achievement is just here to document this embarrassing incident. Well, some people will insist that managing to do such thing is also a accomplishment.

There is no shame or weakness in mourning on the old mans grave (which is basically the grave of you your previous self). Take this achievement to give you some comfort in your pain.

When you manage to make it to a village it is time to spend all your hard earned gold! Visit all the shops a village has to offer.

Carry 5 of each diamond type with you but remember you can't eat them!

Equip yourself with the highest tier armor which will guarantee you to make a glorious impression on every knights party. It also increases your chance for survival in this cruel world.

Throw a mine bomb and then roll it for 100 knight feed without having it explode. Make sure to make it hop over obstacles and don't accidentally hit the ignite button!

The boulders you are rolling with are the biggest but you gotta make sure to show it to everyone while the beats are banging out your ...wait, just speed it up 3 times with your lance and don't mind any casualties it rolls over!

It is magical, glorious, magnificent and all out spectacular while you wear it on your unworthy head. Show some respect for the hat and bow in front of it! All glory to the hat!

Destroy a tier 2 armor or higher till it breaks off and everyone can see your underpants! You better laid out the best, this morning, for this occasion. (Your underwear is generated by a algorithm that takes your personality in account.)

And you thought only a fool would want to step into your boots and set out in this cruel world. But here is someone to proof you wrong, that is of course when you give him a nice sum of extra motivation.

Let a Blacksmith repair a armor which is completely destroyed. With all those pieces missing, in no time and that all for a flat price - he really is the most talented and most humble craftsman from here to the edge of the world!

Find and reach the Stairs to The Sky wonder of the world.

Find and reach The Colossus of Bogussus wonder of the world.

Find and reach The Garden of Paradise wonder of the world.