Okay then...
Not unlocked yetSlash slash slash
Ato
Not unlocked yetComplete the game
Accessible Difficulty Complete
Not unlocked yetBeat Ato on Accessible difficulty or higher
Experienced Difficulty Complete
Not unlocked yetBeat Ato on Experienced difficulty or higher
True Swordsman
Not unlocked yetBeat Ato on Bushido or Hell difficulty
A Taste of Madness
Not unlocked yetBeat the first 3 bosses on Hell difficulty
Statue Park
Not unlocked yetSurely this room has a purpose...
One Hit
Not unlocked yetBeat Ato on One Hit difficulty
Sayonara
Not unlocked yetExit the game
Runeless
Not unlocked yetBeat Ato without collecting a Rune
Dodgeless
Not unlocked yetBeat Ato without obtaining a dodge ability
Vow of Poverty
Not unlocked yetBeat Ato without collecting Talismans, Coins, Runes nor extra Magic
Gotta Go Fast
Not unlocked yetBeat Ato in under two hours
Seems familiar...
Not unlocked yetSelf-referential secrets are the best